The Avengers!

Assalamualaikum sayangs!

Rawrr! tahu tak 'The Avengers' tu ape? alaa tu la new movie yang tgh meletops sekarang ni after 'The Battleship'. THUMBS UP for that movie. personally, super awesome and quite funny tengok watak Stark tu. dalam cerita ni dia punya watak tu macam bengong bengong sikit. ahakk! even effa sempat lagi terlelap but seriously that movie is ohsemm :)

The Avengers Marvel

well, niat dihati tercapai lagi bila en boipren belanja tgk wayang semalam. hehe terima kasih cintahati. next movie effa belanja pulak ye. last night we went together with en boipren's kazen (Amat & Aslam) and also his classmate (Dikchong) kira nya berlima lah kann and im the odd one. ;/  nasib baik Aslam & me quite rapat jugak even though jarang jumpa, but at least i dont feel like im the odd one. ada la jugak benda nak digurau kannnn...

after 5 days, semalam baru berkesempatan jumpa si en boipren and im glad, he is getting fat.'awok makan ape balik melakau? sihat bebeno badan'. but nevermind, i just like the way you are en boipren :')

tengok tengok. makin bulat kan dia? :)

but actually, effa sama je gemok :/

okay itu saja untuk kali ni. thank you for everything my dear. goodluck for your work, your innovation day, your others commitment. i love you and will always support youu :')

-stress-pressure-life-

hye. memang betul kata orang kan. nak buat benda baik ni memang banyak dugaan yang kita dapat. tapi, effa x rasa effa kuat untuk semua dugaan tu. bukan senang nak manage time betul2. kadang2 kita kena korbankan benda lain untuk dapatkan sesuatu yang kita nak. Oh Allah, i beg you. please, give me the strength. i am not strong enough to face this alone.

cakap memang senang, nak pergi buat pasport kena pergi sini and sini and sana. tapi pernah tak fikir macam mana nak pergi sini and sana tu? pernah tak terfikir berapa kena belanja untuk pergi sini and sana tu? memang la kita perlu berkorban, tapi effa rasa semua tu kena ada limit. effa x akan susahkan orang untuk kepentingan effa. unless diorang volunteer nak tolong then im free to allow them.

sampai sekarang effa fikir, ni semua dugaan or petanda dari Allah? dugaan nak pergi tempat Allah or petanda untuk effa back off. maybe effa belum layak lagi kot nak pergi sana. memang la family effa mampu nak tanggung kos pergi n balik semua. tapi, me myself dah ready ke nak pergi sana? im not going there for fun. i am going for the sake of Allah n myself. mama pesan, kena set niat awal2 sebelum pergi sana sebab takut Allah marah dgn niat yang x betul.

effa x mampu nak jadi kuat lagi dah. one by one masalah datang. dan setiap kali tu jugak effa susahkan semua orang. that is not me.effa x suka susahkan orang tapi itulah benda yang paling salu effa buat. mesti ade je mengemis mintak belas kasihan kat orang. sumpah rasa malu kat diri sendiri.

i feel useless! memang anak x berguna aku ni. dah ada peluang x reti pulak nak guna. sumpah, i am tired of my life. korang senang la nak cakap, be strong be strong. tapi yang menanggung tu aku. aku je tahu rasa macam mana nak tanggung semua tu. bukan setakat kawan je yang x faham, parents sendiri pun sama je. omagad! sumpah x faham. sumpah x suka life macam ni. sumpah x kuat. sumpah sakit hati. sumpah x tahu nak buat apa dah. i am just a normal person. i cant be extraordinary. i want a simple life.

"ohh Allah,if this is what You have set for me, i beg Allah, i beg. Give me the strength to face this alone. please give me ways to solve it without troubling anyone. i do not want to be a burden for them.
oh Allah, if i am not meant to go there, give me any guidance as an indication that i am not for that place. please Allah, i beg. i am not strong Allah."


*sekarang kena muhasabah diri banyak banyak. kawan cakap, mesti ada hikmah disebalik semua ini. and i believe it. 

P.A.D.U.

Assalamualaikum sayangs! hye hye :)

apa itu padu? kuat? bergaya? cantik? bijak? oh no no..PADU is one the rumah sukan yang ade kat IPIK. well, hari ni baru habis event utk KOT and i am the one who in charge perbarisan, sorakan and keceriaan kawasan rumah sukan. *sumpah rasa macam zaman muda dulu. 

jom kite enjoy gambar duluuu

Maskot rumah PADU!

with BFF & juniors

kami kuat sebab kami PADU!

cara duduk x moleh melah -.-

E for Effa. Effa for Paat. eh! PADU LAH >.<

done with those annoying photos? ok now dengar cerita i pulak.. this time around, i am the one who in charge perbarisan and sorakan. omagadd i have never experience this before. plus, bukan senang nak handle orang especially bile orang dah rasa diri tu besar sangat. i mean, kalau time form 5 dulu maybe senang nak arah budak2 junior bawah kita, tp bukan time kat IPG ni kot. sebab masing2 dah rasa diri besar n boleh decide nak rebel or not. but it is not a big deal actually. one thing to remember is, 

'kau masuk IPG kau nak jadi cikgu. and cikgu-cikgu x kan dapat lari dari semua ni masa kat sekolah nanti. so, just take semua ni sebagai salah satu ilmu baru untuk kau belajar. benda kena lah dibelajar dari bawah, nanti dah naik senior baru kau in charge everything and get upset with pressure here and there."

so, after all i have learnt so much from this experienced. how to deal myself with the situation. how to deal with people around me. it is not easy people. not easy. of course bila kita dah jadi ketua (so-called ketualah) untuk something tu, x semua orang akan suka dengan cara bekerja kita and from there u will be dealing with conflicts. serious. benda ni buat effa jadi lebih matang sikit lah, sikit je. tapi at least u gain something kan?

so, in future i really hope that this kind of opportunity come again and i hope i will be able to do something that make myself proud as well as people around me. InsyaAllah :)

Thanks to Allah, bagi kekuatan sepanjang handle benda ni. Alhamdulillah :)

*sekarang focus dengan study and benda yang perlu dibuat! another responsibility comes~

Praise to Allah ^.^

Assalammualaikum sayangs!

Alhamdulillah Alhamdulillah Alhamdulillah ya Allah :)

haa i guess everyone knows what picture is that right? Itulah Kaabah. Kaabah terletak kat mana? terletak di Tanah Suci Mekah. Alhamdulillah, dalam keadaan yang lemah menahan sakit, i received a good news from mama. it is CONFIRMED! yep. our status are confirm. If Allah panjangkan usia dan permudahkan segala urusan, 30 May until 10 June, Effa mama ayah angah n maksu akan berangkat pergi ke Mekah untuk menunaikan umrah. walaupun hanya pergi sana untuk menunaikan umrah, but deep inside i am thankful to Allah sebab at this age, He give me an opportunity to have a visit at His place. Thank you Allah. Thank you.
bukanlah diri ni nak menunjuk-nunjuk. TAK! hanyalah sekadar ingin berkongsi perasaan yang becampur baur ni. siapa yang x happy dapat peluang pergi ke tanah suci? tipu cakap effa x happy. TAPI, of course perasaan suka gembira tu becampur dengan perasaan sayu sedih takut. sebab apa? sebab effa hanyalah insan biasa yang banyak buat dosa. i am a weak person.

during last school holiday in March, my mum memang dah tanya and ajak pergi sekali at the end of this year. but during that time, i dont feel like i wanna go. i feel like i am not ready yet. i am just 20. i am afraid if i were given a punishment from Allah for all my sins there. in short, i am not ready yet. but then, after that day i used to ask myself. whats wrong if i go? whats the problem. memang la effa masih terlalu muda dan perasaan x ready tu ada lagi dalam diri, tapi kenapa tidak aku pergi je? orang cakap, lagi senang nak dapat hidayah Allah once we were there. i told my friend too and asked their opinion about this. they are so positive, they give me strength and motivated me to go. tapi at that time rasa macam dah terlambat je nak bagitahu kat mama, so i keep it to myself.

then, yesterday i called my mum and she asked me for the second time whether i would like to go or not. immediately i respond, 'YES MUMMY YES! I WANNA GO!'  Ya Allah. at that time, hanya Allah saje yang tahu perasaan effa macam mana. eventhough belum hantar nama and belum confirm lagi pergi, tapi rasa happy sangat! ALHAMDULILLAH :)

sekarang, mama dah bagi kerja yang nak kena buat by myself.
1. buat injection kat klinik swasta (this injection is for those yg nak pergi haji)
2. buat visa antarabangsa
3. ambik gambar pasport yang belakang dia hitam
4 then after all, fax semua benda ni kat mama

tengok, banyak kerja nak kena buat kan? tapi takpe. effa rasa semua benda yang effa buat kerana ALLAH TAALA, mesti Allah akan bagi hadiah baik punya in future.

so, here i need everyone's support and courageousness so that i can improve myself from time to time. again, bukanlah diri ni nak menunjuk nunjuk. NOPE. tidak sama sekali tapi hanyalah ingin berkongsi perasaan yang gumbira suka ria di hari hari rayaaaa :D

salam sayang sayangs! muah muahh :)

Assalammualaikum and hye :'(

i need my mom. i just want to tell her everything. everything that happen to me. how people treat me. how i treat them back. how bad i am until i was isolated from people that i love the most.
i need someone to talk to. someone who can lend me their ears. i dont need any reply, just listen to what i am going to say. AND I NEED SOMEONE'S SHOULDER TO CRY. i just want to cry and cry and cry.

"when someone walk out your life, let them. They are just making more room from someone better to walk in"

"it is sad when people you know become people you knew"

*this situation is killing me, really do. i am tired of being strong. i cant people. seriously i cant.

mama, effa mok balit. effa x tahan diam ctuk. mama please.. just do anything. tukar IPG ka, tukar course ka. please mama. do something for me. effa x tahan dah stay here. i have another 4 years and this is juat one and half year mama. how can i survive another 4 years? mama :'(

"Every bad situation will have something positive. Even a dead clock shows the correct time twice a day. Stay positive in life"

i hope that quotation is true. seriously please be true. i am sad. sad. sad. everyone deserves happiness, isnt it ? but why i never get a chance to experience once? why? 

is it not easy for us to stay positive. it is depends on the situation that we faced. dah la. xmau tulis panjang. it worthless coz no one cares. no one. 

s0-called 'Anniversary Celebration'

Assalamualaikum and hye all :D

Alhamdulillah, hubungan dengan en boipren sudah genap setahun dalam masa setahun ni macam macam perkara/masalah kita share bersama. Thanks Allah. Thanks my-imam-to-be, Muhammad Farhat Uzair Bin Baharuddin. terima kasih untuk segele-gelenye ehekk! :p

never thought that we are going to celebrate this day (04/04/2012) because dua dua teacher-to-be ni busy especially en boipren yang sibuk sesangat sibuk menguruskan KOT IPIK utk tahun ni. Goodluck cintahati! i know you can do it checher paat! :*

oh yes. for the first time in my life, i went to pavilion. wooohooo! like seriously i sound so noob. oh well, it is not im so noob BUT i dont have any niat or hajat or whatever going there. i mean like, what for? mampukah aku nak berlagak lagak berjalan dengan poket kosong dlm pavi yg serba mewah tu? nope! nope! habes duit mak bapak aku saje nanti~ "likewise i am a good girl x mintak duit mak bapak*

look at those pictures that had been taken on last saturday (07/04/2012)

*makseh cekgu mbak kamek kua bjalan jalan nangga wayang. makseh bebanyak! muah muahh sayang semua nyaaa

Assalammualaikum sayangs dan sayangs sekalian :)

when i were asked a question, which place i wanna go the most i would give you a list of place names. this is due to pressure that i felt for almost 3weeks. Assignments. Friends. Family. but this is it. dugaan time belajar kannn. sabar dan terus bersabar selagi mampu. one ofmy friend said that, biarlah kita je yang sakit hati tapi jangan biar orang lain sakit hati sebab kesalahan dan kebodohan yang kita buat. oh yeahh! memang bukan aku la kalau x sakitkan hati orang but at least now aku rasa aku bersabar sikit kot.

what am i talking about ni? supposedly i talk about places that i wanna go kannn? ok here we go..

1. i-city

cantik kan? why i really wanna go there? why? because there are many lights there :D in person, i like something colourful something that make my heart calm AND everytime i look at those colourful lights my heart-beat beats calmly. ehekk so bila diri tengah tension penat macam ni, i-city is a place where i think the most suitable place for me now.

2. Genting Highlands

i wanna have fun! especially rasa macam nak main pusing pusing tu. awesome okay. i wanna have another second time pusing pusing dengan benda tu! don u think it is awesome enough to release all the tension? Super awesome for me :)

3. Beach

what comes to your mind whenever you look at those photos? me feel like kaho na pyaar hey. ehekk! x kisah la mana mana pantai pun. as long as i can burn my skin there and boleh berlari lari tepi pantai. splashh splashhh splassshh the waves hit me. :D

4. Singapore (USS)

lastly. i wanna here! this country! so in order to have a foot step there, apa lagi. mula lah berjimat simpan duit. once i have opportunity to go there, aku akan buat negara tu macam negara aku sendiri. biarlah beribu habis duit, i dont mind. janji hati puas. balik Malaysia puasa sebulan.

well. thats all. bunyi macam banyak sje kan? ehekk.. itu semua propa. InsyaAllah, nanti boleh pergi kat semua tempat yang aku nak ni. AMIN. kena usaha dan yakin dgn diri!

#for this entry, i am using 'aku'. eee sorry!